Sunday, February 20, 2005

LIVAN!

New Blog! I'll let DCNatsFans describe itself: "DCNatsFans is an aggregator of editorial content, stats and chatter regarding the Washington Nats and also is intended as a group blog." Cool idea. Go sign up.

I don't have much to say, and you're not going to read it anyway, as I'm sure most of you lucky bastards have Presidents Day off. Well, Ryan doesn't, and he's bitter. I would like to announce, though, that my position on Livan Hernandez has changed from that of fanatical advocate to full-on hero worshipper. Livan, or as I'm going to render it, LIVAN!, has moved into the Pantheon with Jack Evans and the guy who invented the Puppy Bowl. What prompted this was an interview at CapitolDugout.com with former Expos radio guy Elliot Price, who may be joining us for the Nats' first season.
Price thinks that the Nationals have the one of the best under publicized players in the game as their opening day pitcher. “Hernandez won the Silver Slugger and he should have won the Gold Glove. Maddux can’t make the plays that Livan makes, nobody can.”
Especially the play where he stole my heart.
Defensively, he compared LIVAN!'s movements to a Wayne Gretzky pass.
Serious ethnological question: can Canadians ever not talk about hockey?
“You know where he doesn’t look, he just gets the puck there? It’s like the game is moving at a different speed for him. It’s the same with Hernandez,” Price said. “Livan [sic] has the ability to make that decision (where the ball should go) in a fraction of an instant, much faster than anyone else out there. Say, a bunt play and there’s the guy going into second. ‘Do I have time?’ He almost makes the throw before the ball gets into his glove; he makes the decision that fast. He never rushes and he always makes the right play. Not always the safe play, but the right one.”
Remember at the end of the Matrix when Ted Logan figures everything out and sees the bad guys as a series of ones and zeroes? Everything looks like that to LIVAN!.
Is he the best overall player on the team? “When they first made the trade I was talking with the Giants guys and they said ‘He’s our best player’ He should be the same on the Nats—“The guys that can hit like him and field like him can’t pitch like him.”
With all due respect, those Giants guys were full of shit (if I'm reading that sentence right - did the Giants guys mean the Expos when the said "our" or the Giants?). LIVAN!'s an unbeatable superhero, but the Giants have a swollen-headed god on their team. But yeah, he's totally the best player on this crappy team.
There is also a reason to get to the ballpark early, Price said. “Something that fans might want to go out and see before the game. Livan will take balls at shortstop during warm-ups.”
Awesome! I say we play LIVAN! at short every time he's not pitching, but he should be pitching every other game.

In other news, it sounds like Frank is trying to scare Inning-Endy Chavez (tm Capitol Punishment) into not sucking so bad.
Well, manager Frank Robinson isn't so sure about center field.
"That's the one job I'm really kind of open-minded about," Robinson said yesterday.
Which means Endy Chavez, who started 122 games there last year, will have to earn the job this spring.
Good. Here's the problem, though: are they going to evaluate whether Endy's improved based on a bunch of meaningless exhibition games? Or are they going to wait until kills a bunch of rallies in the contests that matter? We're screwed either way. Free Ryan Church!

5 comments:

Chris Needham said...

Wow. Inning-Endy might catch on. Too bad it's so cumbersome though!

Yeah, the Giants people were insane. Take a look at the numbers he put up with them. He stunk up the park for two years there.

But, think of every bad hacktastic action movie you've seen. Our heroes need to fail before they triumph in the end. Adrian!

Basil said...

"Inning-Endy." I was trying to remember this phrase just the other day. I like it, Chris.

Oh, btw---no work tomorrow. Thank you, Uncle Sam!

Ryan said...

There's been a lot of LIVAN! stuff in the mainstream media lately. I haven't read all of it, but I don't remember seeing any reference to his arm angle experiment that apparently fixed him and made him the hero to us all.

Yuda said...

I've theoretically got the day off today, but I came in so I can get a comp day to use sometime when it's actually, like, warm and stuff.

Olivier said...

There you go.

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/columns/story?columnist=neyer_rob&id=1609941

Boy, am I gonna miss baseball...