And now, to honor the other Manager of the Year winner, four rad things about Ozzie Guillen:
- He hires people to murder chickens for good luck -- just like Pedro Cerrano!
- When getting Bobby Jenks out of the bullpen, he makes the universal arm gesture for "big fat guy."
- He's willing to lively up a dull day with a swear- and threat-laced rant. Watch out, Magglio Ordonez, you made yourself a big enemy!
"He's a piece of [bleep]," Guillen said. "He's another Venezuelan [bleep]. [Bleep] him. He thinks he's got an enemy? No, he's got a big one. He knows I can [bleep] him over in a lot of different ways.
"He better shut the [bleep] up and just play for the Detroit Tigers. Why do I have to go over and even apologize to him? Who the [bleep] is Magglio Ordonez? What did he ever do for me? He didn't do [bleep] for me. But he said I'm his enemy -- he knows me. Tell him he knows me, and he can take it how he wants to take it.
"Did he play good for me? Yes, he did. Did he play hard for me? Yes, he did. He might like me. He might be sensitive of me. He might be jealous of me, I don't know why. But saying I'm his enemy, he hates me, I could care less what that [bleep] thinks. I don't give a [bleep] what he does with the rest of his life. He [bleep] with the wrong guy, and he knows that, too. He knows for a fact that he [bleep] with the wrong people.''
- But beneath the pissed-off, barely intelligible exterior, he's all about the love.