Expos Update

I'm not doing this because I want to. The Expos are not a good team, and every time they get shut out (eight times and counting!), I am reminded that even if they do come to DC, they will have done so too late to keep Vlad Guerrero.
Furthermore, I know next to nothing about them and have no idea what I'm talking about. But I guess that's just one of things you have to overcome if you want to be a powerhouse blogger. So, here goes:
The scalpers had the day off yesterday as the Expos were in Kansas City for a double header. Montreal's finest swept the luckless Royals as Nick Johnson, this blog's favorite Expo and third favorite living American, knocked 3 hits in 5 attempts, along with one of his trademark walks. Young Zach Day was the hero of game one, scattering six hits in a complete game shut-out. Tony "the Baptist" Batista, last seen striking out 400 times as an Oriole, hit two home runs off the hilariously named Jimmy Gobble to lead the 'Spos to a 7-2 victory in the nightcap.
The wins brought the Expos all the way up to 20-38, and now the club has an opportunity to battle it out with the Bavasified Mariners (22-36) for the worst record in the major leagues.