Distinguished Senators, the Washington Nationals Blog That Is Great

Monday, July 11, 2005

Paging Dr. Guillen

The Nats are limping into the All Star break. The injuries are mounting, and that's led to a couple of series lost to our suck-ass divisional rivals. Jose Guillen knows what the problem is: too many pansies!
"We have some key players that just keep getting hurt, like Churchy and Nick and Guzzy," Guillen said. "Without those three guys, I don't think the team's looking the same.

"You know we need Nick. We need some of those guys to learn how to play in pain. They need to step it up and have to understand, right now, in the second half, there's no baby-sitting anyone."

Thanks for the diagnosis, Dr. Guillen! I'm sure Johnson is going to ignore both his doctors and his own physical pain now that he's learned that all he lacks is testicular fortitude. I'm also sure that he'll be damn glad to see you when he gets back and will probably thank you in person for your help. For my part, I'm going to file this medical advice alongside Dr. Boswell's -- hey, were you guys in the same class at Jackass Medical College? And as long as you're dispensing medical advice, here's a prescription from Dr. Ryan: 500 mg of SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU PRICK.

2 comments:

Brian said...

500 mg of SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU PRICK

I thought that only came as a suppository.

Natty Bumpo said...

did anyone catch george michael's interview with bowden on nbc4 last night? i only caught the last bit of it, but he seemed to be reciting lines from boswell's column, describing the difference between an "injured" player and a "hurt" player. in my eye, the obvious conclusion is that bowden was boswell's source. but moreover, if ryan church's supposed inability to be a "gamer" is the general belief in the clubhouse and the reason for pursuing preston wilson, why is bowden making such a public display? seems to only be hurting the team and hurting church's trade value (the eventual next step?).