Hippocraticritical

Why exactly is Ian Desmond playing every day?

The Nationals' roster construction philosophy appears to be built around a variation of the first line of the Hippocratic Oath. Instead of "First do no harm," it's "First don't hurt anyone's feelings (except for Drew Storen's)."

You can't replayce Jayson Werth - that would be insulting. You can't sit Ian Desmond no matter how terrible he's been. Feelings, man.

Perhaps the Nats would be surprised to learn that neither "First do no harm" nor "First don't hurt anyone's feelings (except for Drew Storen's)" is actually in the Hippocratic Oath. I learned that about a minute and half ago, and I still haven't recovered from the shock.

If Hippocrates didn't say it, maybe it's not a good principle for running a baseball team.

Hippocrates: "Don't blame me for this garbage, bro."

You don't need me to tell you that Ian Desmond has not been a contributor this year. He's hitting like Jayson Werth, and he's fielding like Jayson Werth. A list of possible shortstops who would be doing less than Desmond to sabotage 2015 includes:

1. Jason Martinson
2. Miguel Tejada
3. Trea Turner
4. Cristian Guzman
5. Yunel Escobar
6. Danny Espinosa

Espinosa's the most obvious option, but why he's not playing is anything but obvious. He has one (1) plate appearance since the Pirates series at the end of July. Why do you pinch hit with Werth (56 OPS+) when Espinosa (101 OPS+) is sitting there on the bench trying to remember what playing baseball is like?

Sure, Espinosa's not a real shortstop, and sure, his beard starts, like, right under his eyeballs, but neither of those should be enough to keep him out of the lineup like this. Put him at second, Escobar at short, and Rendon at third. Or just leave him at short and see what happens. The Nats are getting F-minus production from short; Espinosa can maybe get that up to a C.

I don't know - is it really just about Desmond's feelings? Everyone seems to like him; maybe the Nats are worried about a mutiny if Desi gets dissed, and the Werth situation shows that they are afraid to make a grown man cry by sitting him.

Or maybe they think Desmond's the best option. That's even worse.

Stand by for News

Anthony Rendon's back! That's great. Rendon is my favorite Nat for two reasons:

1. He came up through the system. I saw him in a game with Harrisburg. He didn't do anything, but he was there. Well all like dudes our team drafted more, right?
2. It was a mere nine years ago that I told Nats fans that we were going to love Matt LeCroy because of his miles of smiles. The first thing I noticed when Rendon came up was how cheerful he seemed. He was always smiling, and his body language seemed to say "Yay I'm in the majors!" It was really endearing.

And then he turned out to be the best player on the team last year, so it all worked out pretty nicely.

Now he's back, and they decided that he's a second baseman again. According to the dude on the MASN broadcast that they got to replace Debbie Taylor, the Nats' reasoning here is that they want to keep Yunel Escobar in the lineup, but they don't want him to switch positions because it might make him uncomfortable.

Who cares if Yunel Escobar is uncomfortable? Sure, he's been a pleasant surprise. He's jacking all kinds of singles and probably scoring on a lot of Bryce Harper homers, but you don't move Rendon out of his natural position for a guy like Escobar.

It only lasted an inning before Escobar came out of the game and Rendon was playing third anyway, but still. I don't like the thinking there.

By the way, when I saw Rendon with Harrisburg, his manager was . . . Matt LeCroy.

And now you know the rest of the story. Good day.

Looking Up

This is just going to keep happening, huh? Last night's Orioles game was more entertaining.

It wasn't free, either. We used to have two guys who were hitting, but Andrelton Simmons took care of Yunel Escobar, so we're down to one, and we're looking up at the Phillies.

So I guess we're just going to have to wait for tonight for the season to turn around. See you then.

"One second there, hoss. Before we wrap up, I want to introduce you all to the newest Doug's Dude.

Doug's Dingers is expanding its efforts to help guys who have chick names. Take a bow, Kelly Johnson!"

"Thanks for the dinger, Doug! So you guys have pretty much given up on catching the Mets at this point, huh?"

"Ha ha! You bet, Kelly. We're just terrible."